Besides the fact that it is 85 degrees and sunny in Portland today, news out of California has me all aflutter.
Despite all my conflicted feelings about having gone to law school, those three years getting my JD provided me a new lens through which to interpret news. Links to the decision abound, but here it is again (172 page PDF) for your pleasure.
Marriage is a fundamental right. Felons [edit: Prisoners] get it, and (gasp) gay people should get it too.
.
Showing posts with label media. Show all posts
Showing posts with label media. Show all posts
15.5.08
4.4.08
40 years on 4/4
I've recently discovered Blue Oregon and would like to point out a post by Chip Shields: Wages and War - the King Speeches You Won't Hear Today.
My favorite quote from the video clip below? "I was increasingly compelled to see the war as an enemy of the poor and attack it as such."
Noticing how much these issues are intertwined is imperative if we are to truly find and make change. Forty-plus years later, it's still true.
My favorite quote from the video clip below? "I was increasingly compelled to see the war as an enemy of the poor and attack it as such."
Noticing how much these issues are intertwined is imperative if we are to truly find and make change. Forty-plus years later, it's still true.
28.3.08
In Case You Hadn't Heard
One of the things I really enjoy about living in Oregon is the spectrum. Right here, in this one state, we have legislators who tell gay folks to shut up and compare Oregon to Nazi Germany by virtue of its anti-discrimination law. There are fierce and ongoing legal battles about the afore-mentioned anti-discrimination law and statewide domestic partnership rights. And now, Oregon is home to a widely publicized transgender pregnancy, the original story appearing in the 4/8/08 Advocate. [I've fixed the link that apparently wasn't working when I first made this post.]
Blogs I follow that have commented:
* Recovering Straight Girl on 3/25/08
* Stumptown Girl on 3/26/08
* Firecracker! on Lesbiatopia on 3/27/08
* More from Recovering Straight Girl on 3/28/08
What I find most striking is not that a transmale is pregnant, nor that he and his wife are afforded federal protections because they are legally married. Nor am I surprised that they have encountered significant discrimination and lack of support.
What is interesting to me is that legal gender identity, personal sexual and gender identities, and interpersonal identities intersect in interesting and unique ways. This situation, and the resulting discussions, cause me to reflect on the importance and relevance of my undergraduate degree in Women's/Gender Studies. I spent much of my early- to mid-twenties unpacking and assessing matters of gender, social "reading" of bodies, identification, and meaning.
In both my undergraduate program and in law school, the greatest lessons I gained with my diplomas was that THERE IS SO DAMN MUCH THAT I JUST DON'T KNOW. Gaining comfort with that level of ignorance, without settling into complacency, is an ongoing and humbling experience that has provided an entry into connection and compassion with my fellow beings whose life experiences differ from or parallel my own. It's an imperfect comfort, and is often more riddled with fits and starts than endowed with a smooth glide into true connection. But ultimately, I consider the journey one of the most precious aspects of my life thus far. One teacher in particular, S.Pace, is and was a key catalyst for that journey. To her, I am deeply and eternally grateful.
Kudos to the parents-to-be in Bend for their candor, and best wishes for a smooth birth experience for their child, expected in July 08.
Stretching our concepts of reality to include the experiences of others is one of the most blessed opportunities of being human.
Blogs I follow that have commented:
* Recovering Straight Girl on 3/25/08
* Stumptown Girl on 3/26/08
* Firecracker! on Lesbiatopia on 3/27/08
* More from Recovering Straight Girl on 3/28/08
What I find most striking is not that a transmale is pregnant, nor that he and his wife are afforded federal protections because they are legally married. Nor am I surprised that they have encountered significant discrimination and lack of support.
What is interesting to me is that legal gender identity, personal sexual and gender identities, and interpersonal identities intersect in interesting and unique ways. This situation, and the resulting discussions, cause me to reflect on the importance and relevance of my undergraduate degree in Women's/Gender Studies. I spent much of my early- to mid-twenties unpacking and assessing matters of gender, social "reading" of bodies, identification, and meaning.
In both my undergraduate program and in law school, the greatest lessons I gained with my diplomas was that THERE IS SO DAMN MUCH THAT I JUST DON'T KNOW. Gaining comfort with that level of ignorance, without settling into complacency, is an ongoing and humbling experience that has provided an entry into connection and compassion with my fellow beings whose life experiences differ from or parallel my own. It's an imperfect comfort, and is often more riddled with fits and starts than endowed with a smooth glide into true connection. But ultimately, I consider the journey one of the most precious aspects of my life thus far. One teacher in particular, S.Pace, is and was a key catalyst for that journey. To her, I am deeply and eternally grateful.
Kudos to the parents-to-be in Bend for their candor, and best wishes for a smooth birth experience for their child, expected in July 08.
Stretching our concepts of reality to include the experiences of others is one of the most blessed opportunities of being human.
27.3.08
Not About Courage
So I really set myself up, making my last blog post about courage and then saying I'd dig deeper in my next post. The result? Waiting 16 days to post again.
The only way I could compel myself to compose today was by giving myself permission to break with the whole courage bit (how cowardly!) and just put something, anything, up. I'll get back to courage when I can stomach the thought of going there. My reticence shows me how I'm not ready to really explore what I had intended and that itself is further food for courageous thought and action.
In the mean time, enjoy this important piece about the Christian Gene. What do these findings mean to you? Should a person be held responsible for something that is genetic? What kinds of religio-engineering processes should be ethically permitted?
Yeah. This one's definitely NOT about courage. Au contraire.
The only way I could compel myself to compose today was by giving myself permission to break with the whole courage bit (how cowardly!) and just put something, anything, up. I'll get back to courage when I can stomach the thought of going there. My reticence shows me how I'm not ready to really explore what I had intended and that itself is further food for courageous thought and action.
In the mean time, enjoy this important piece about the Christian Gene. What do these findings mean to you? Should a person be held responsible for something that is genetic? What kinds of religio-engineering processes should be ethically permitted?
Yeah. This one's definitely NOT about courage. Au contraire.
23.1.08
consume this
Victor Lebow, a post WWII retailing analyst:
So again I tell myself: Buy less. Live more.
.
"Our enormously productive economy . . . demands that we make consumption our way of life, that we convert the buying and use of goods into rituals, that we seek our spiritual satisfaction, our ego satisfaction, in consumption . . . we need things consumed, burned up, replaced, and discarded at an ever-accelerating rate.This article, and the above quote, have prompted me to find creative ways around outright replacing my dear technological companion, though the prospect of being away from her again for repairs tears at my heart. (Why do they make these things disposable?! They told me I was LUCKY to get three years out of my laptop!)
So again I tell myself: Buy less. Live more.
.
20.1.08
Men's Abortions & The War Mentality
Two weeks ago I read two articles about abortion on the same day. I'm glad I read them in the order that I did because the first one placed my paradigm in a more inclusive rather than exclusive stance.
The first article (A Change of Heart: From Pro Life to Pro Choice, AlterNet 1/9/08) included a perspective I needed to hear: "Our beliefs are not created by what -- or who -- we are against. They exist because of what we are for: comprehensive reproductive health for all, and the ability to decide for ourselves if we will or will not have an abortion."
A line from the second article (Changing Abortion's Pronoun, LA Times 1/7/08) elicited an audible groan from me, and my mind went to The Handmaid's Tale by Margaret Atwood and Starhawk's description of The Southlands in The Fifth Sacred Thing. A man, discussing his personal regret about several ex-girlfriends' abortions: "'I never really thought about it for the woman,' he says slowly." What?! He never really thought about the woman part of the equation in an abortion scenario? Excuse me?
It's an interesting catch-22. Though it disgusts me, it doesn't surprise me that anti-abortion activists will utilize women's termination regret to influence the courts toward the incorrectly-perceived need to "protect" women from their own choices. But would they do the same with men's regret as a motivator? To protect men from themselves? I do not doubt that some men experience loss or sadness over the termination of a pregnancy in which they played a role. But is regret the best measure of whether or not government should permit certain reproductive medical decisions?
Back when I was a married-to-a-man queer grrl, before the polyamorous part of our marriage was predominant, my husband and I terminated a pregnancy. In Utah. I wrote about it here, when the South Dakota mess was in the news. In the post, I half-heartedly pretended it wasn't me, but it was probably pretty obvious. Many women have termination stories; I have one. I don't see why men shouldn't get to tell their stories too.
My ambivalence toward abortion topics is deep and multi-layered. I believe it important to let stories and voices be heard, and yet I also recognize the deeply personal realm of reproduction, coming from a family where fertility, miscarriage, and ectopic (tubal) pregnancies were wrapped in whispered conversations, kept from children, spoken about with solemn secrecy.
The more we share, all of us, the more information we have, the greater likelihood that we might just be able to see each other and really connect and not live under the illusion that our way of experiencing the world is the only way it's experienced. The more information, more connection, more understanding, more empathy, the better. That includes having empathy for people who truly believe that abortion should be illegal. If I can empathize with their feelings, it may be a vital step in bridging the gap in our perspectives, and maybe that person will one day believe that even if abortion is not a choice s/he would make or want a loved one to make, it is a choice that should nevertheless be available in a legal and safe way. The "fight" is more about increased connection and communication rather than fighting. Give peace a chance, wo/man.
. . .
The first article (A Change of Heart: From Pro Life to Pro Choice, AlterNet 1/9/08) included a perspective I needed to hear: "Our beliefs are not created by what -- or who -- we are against. They exist because of what we are for: comprehensive reproductive health for all, and the ability to decide for ourselves if we will or will not have an abortion."
A line from the second article (Changing Abortion's Pronoun, LA Times 1/7/08) elicited an audible groan from me, and my mind went to The Handmaid's Tale by Margaret Atwood and Starhawk's description of The Southlands in The Fifth Sacred Thing. A man, discussing his personal regret about several ex-girlfriends' abortions: "'I never really thought about it for the woman,' he says slowly." What?! He never really thought about the woman part of the equation in an abortion scenario? Excuse me?
It's an interesting catch-22. Though it disgusts me, it doesn't surprise me that anti-abortion activists will utilize women's termination regret to influence the courts toward the incorrectly-perceived need to "protect" women from their own choices. But would they do the same with men's regret as a motivator? To protect men from themselves? I do not doubt that some men experience loss or sadness over the termination of a pregnancy in which they played a role. But is regret the best measure of whether or not government should permit certain reproductive medical decisions?
Back when I was a married-to-a-man queer grrl, before the polyamorous part of our marriage was predominant, my husband and I terminated a pregnancy. In Utah. I wrote about it here, when the South Dakota mess was in the news. In the post, I half-heartedly pretended it wasn't me, but it was probably pretty obvious. Many women have termination stories; I have one. I don't see why men shouldn't get to tell their stories too.
My ambivalence toward abortion topics is deep and multi-layered. I believe it important to let stories and voices be heard, and yet I also recognize the deeply personal realm of reproduction, coming from a family where fertility, miscarriage, and ectopic (tubal) pregnancies were wrapped in whispered conversations, kept from children, spoken about with solemn secrecy.
The more we share, all of us, the more information we have, the greater likelihood that we might just be able to see each other and really connect and not live under the illusion that our way of experiencing the world is the only way it's experienced. The more information, more connection, more understanding, more empathy, the better. That includes having empathy for people who truly believe that abortion should be illegal. If I can empathize with their feelings, it may be a vital step in bridging the gap in our perspectives, and maybe that person will one day believe that even if abortion is not a choice s/he would make or want a loved one to make, it is a choice that should nevertheless be available in a legal and safe way. The "fight" is more about increased connection and communication rather than fighting. Give peace a chance, wo/man.
. . .
16.11.07
Not Enough Retirement Activites?
News of the weird: Dear diary of too much information ...
Article Launched: 11/14/2007 07:59:05 AM MST
For 25 years, the Rev. Robert Shields of Dayton, Wash., had chronicled his life in five-minute segments of banalities, leaving 37 million words on paper filling 91 boxes. His self-described "uninhibited," "spontaneous" work was astonishing in its mundaneness.
Examples: Aug. 13, 1995, 8:40 a.m. "I filled the humidifying basin mounted over the Futura baseboard heater." 8:45 a.m.: "I shaved twice with the Gillette Sensor blade (and) shaved my neck behind both ears, and crossways of my cheeks, too."' July 25, 1993, 7 a.m.: "I cleaned out the tub and scraped my feet with my fingernails to remove layers of dead skin." 7:05 a.m.: "Passed a large, firm stool, and a pint of urine. Used 5 sheets of paper."
-- Chuck Shepherd
8.11.07
Vegansexuals
This article, while amusing, does little to rebut the perception that vegans are exclusive, weird, and perhaps lacking in social skills.
That said, when I'm not eating meat, I can smell a meat-eater across the room. Same thing when I'm not eating dairy. And really, smell has a lot to do with attractiveness, right?
But I do wonder, is oral sex okay for ethically-motivated (as opposed to health-motivated) vegans because it's an issue of consent? As in, My lover consents to my eating her, but the chicken does not consent to my eating its eggs.
Thoughts?
That said, when I'm not eating meat, I can smell a meat-eater across the room. Same thing when I'm not eating dairy. And really, smell has a lot to do with attractiveness, right?
But I do wonder, is oral sex okay for ethically-motivated (as opposed to health-motivated) vegans because it's an issue of consent? As in, My lover consents to my eating her, but the chicken does not consent to my eating its eggs.
Thoughts?
31.8.07
Irresistible
I couldn't help myself. And if you aren't familiar with this series, Get Your War On lives here online. And for other amusements, see My New Fighting Technique is Unstoppable and the subtle links at the bottom of the page. You won't be sorry.
17.8.07
Mainstream Sex Stories
I don't often (or really ever) follow mainstream media. Shocking, I realize. However, I am on an email list from the Woodhull Freedom Foundation, through which I see many stories about sex(uality)-society-politics-law. And recently there were three articles in the mainstream press that caught my attention.
1. The general absence of male-identified folks in articles about bisexuality impacted my impression of Young Women Defy Labels in Intimacy with Both Sexes, Bisexuals Take a 'Flexible' View and Don't Follow a 'Fixed Path,' Say Sexuality Experts. But xx bisexuals are so fantasy-worthy! How silly of me to be bothered by a one-sided focus! At least the article did mention trans folks and resistance to labels and tags to define one's fluid sexuality. I noted, however, that all the women went from relationships with women to relationships with men, and not mentioning heteroprivilege or socialization was a gaping hole. But what did I expect, really, from a piece that mentions Britn*y Spears, Anne H*che, and Ang*lina Jol*e in the opening paragraphs? Favorite quote: "In no way does she deny her history or say she has found her true sexuality. It was all her true sexuality."
2. Polyamory is making it to the mainstream? The Decade of Bad Fashion was invoked, swinging inextricably tied to poly in the headline (oooh, titillating), the piece was hetero/marriage-based, and the question of what constitutes "success" wasn't really explored, but in general I was pleased to see Are Open Marriages More Successful Than Traditional Couplings? A New Generation Tries Swinging, but Leaves the Leisure Suits in the Closet, especially given the source. Favorite quote: "They see it as a high road; it's not cheating, it's growing their relationship."
3. The heteronormative tone and assumptions implicit in Boys, don't be jealous of her toys — play along! How's a guy to compete with the wonders of electronics engineering? annoyed me. Are the phallus-bearers feeling insufficient, given the many choices in small bedroom appliances? How aching that must be for them. Favorite quote: “So much choreography goes into orgasmic sex that sometimes it is wisest to accept help wherever you can get it!”
There's your mainstream media dose for today. Maybe for the month.
* * *
1. The general absence of male-identified folks in articles about bisexuality impacted my impression of Young Women Defy Labels in Intimacy with Both Sexes, Bisexuals Take a 'Flexible' View and Don't Follow a 'Fixed Path,' Say Sexuality Experts. But xx bisexuals are so fantasy-worthy! How silly of me to be bothered by a one-sided focus! At least the article did mention trans folks and resistance to labels and tags to define one's fluid sexuality. I noted, however, that all the women went from relationships with women to relationships with men, and not mentioning heteroprivilege or socialization was a gaping hole. But what did I expect, really, from a piece that mentions Britn*y Spears, Anne H*che, and Ang*lina Jol*e in the opening paragraphs? Favorite quote: "In no way does she deny her history or say she has found her true sexuality. It was all her true sexuality."
2. Polyamory is making it to the mainstream? The Decade of Bad Fashion was invoked, swinging inextricably tied to poly in the headline (oooh, titillating), the piece was hetero/marriage-based, and the question of what constitutes "success" wasn't really explored, but in general I was pleased to see Are Open Marriages More Successful Than Traditional Couplings? A New Generation Tries Swinging, but Leaves the Leisure Suits in the Closet, especially given the source. Favorite quote: "They see it as a high road; it's not cheating, it's growing their relationship."
3. The heteronormative tone and assumptions implicit in Boys, don't be jealous of her toys — play along! How's a guy to compete with the wonders of electronics engineering? annoyed me. Are the phallus-bearers feeling insufficient, given the many choices in small bedroom appliances? How aching that must be for them. Favorite quote: “So much choreography goes into orgasmic sex that sometimes it is wisest to accept help wherever you can get it!”
* * *
There's your mainstream media dose for today. Maybe for the month.
6.7.07
Flag Memory
Since I couldn't be at the Rainbow Gathering, with proximate participation in peace prayers, I stayed at home Wednesday and cuddled with my dog, giving her regular doses of Rescue Remedy to calm her fireworks freakout.
After letting the Independence Day vibrations settle for a day or two, I decided not to let the day go unacknowledged. But how? Then I remembered this . . .
. . . which I stole from J in LA's tribe page. His explanation:
My disillusionment waxes and wanes in cycles. Some days I feel hopeful and optimistic. Others not so much. My dad is a sentimental veteran who persists in reminding me that I have no clue how lucky I am to live in this country. I don't think I'm unlucky. I just think we can do better. If we can't do better, then I'm especially disillusioned.
I was born post-Watergate. The first president I remember was a memory-challenged actor who spoke in passive voice to avoid accountability ("mistakes were made"). The first senate hearings I remember were Oliver North in his medal-strewn uniform. Followed by Clarence Thomas and an uneasy conversation about race, gender, power. I remember a videogame-esque war when I was in junior high. Didn't it last but a week or two? Oh, and the US didn't leave Saudi Arabia like we said we would? Hmmm. A blue dress and a blowjob splashed the headlines during my (not so) formative adolescence. Wasn't there more to the Clinton administration than that . . . ? I'm not sure. Maybe the whole country was inhaling at the time. The Supreme Court's selection of the Executive Branch in 2000, manipulation of emotion post-9/11, endless war . . . and people wonder why my generation is jaded. And it's interesting to me that I don't associate the flag with the country, but with politics. And yes, to me the two are distinct.
That's enough. Right now, I have to study for the bar.
After letting the Independence Day vibrations settle for a day or two, I decided not to let the day go unacknowledged. But how? Then I remembered this . . .
. . . which I stole from J in LA's tribe page. His explanation:I actually sewed the flag onto this shirt in college, when i still thought the USA was a cool place (like in the way that peter fonda was pro USA in easy rider).
then i accidentally ripped the flag. i put the shirt in the closet for years, thinking (a) i don't want to wear a flag around and (b) it looks retarded because it's ripped. then i realized i could make a statement with it. and voila. people immediately responded.
but that was two years ago. i don't know if we can still fix it...
** ** **
My disillusionment waxes and wanes in cycles. Some days I feel hopeful and optimistic. Others not so much. My dad is a sentimental veteran who persists in reminding me that I have no clue how lucky I am to live in this country. I don't think I'm unlucky. I just think we can do better. If we can't do better, then I'm especially disillusioned.
I was born post-Watergate. The first president I remember was a memory-challenged actor who spoke in passive voice to avoid accountability ("mistakes were made"). The first senate hearings I remember were Oliver North in his medal-strewn uniform. Followed by Clarence Thomas and an uneasy conversation about race, gender, power. I remember a videogame-esque war when I was in junior high. Didn't it last but a week or two? Oh, and the US didn't leave Saudi Arabia like we said we would? Hmmm. A blue dress and a blowjob splashed the headlines during my (not so) formative adolescence. Wasn't there more to the Clinton administration than that . . . ? I'm not sure. Maybe the whole country was inhaling at the time. The Supreme Court's selection of the Executive Branch in 2000, manipulation of emotion post-9/11, endless war . . . and people wonder why my generation is jaded. And it's interesting to me that I don't associate the flag with the country, but with politics. And yes, to me the two are distinct.
That's enough. Right now, I have to study for the bar.
1.7.07
Hetero-Only Sex-Positive (ish) Christians?
When I saw Anal Sex in Accordance with God's Will, I couldn't resist posting the link here. Other offerings include
Fisting and God's WillI don't have time to check these out myself, what with bar exam preparations and such, so I can't really comment on them. But wow.
24.4.06
Sex Reading
A few articles I've recently enjoyed & favorite quotes:
Asexuality
"This is where many folks out there in TV land might have trouble believing asexuality is not cover for something else. So you can masturbate and still call yourself asexual?"
G Spot
"A few doctors have argued this spot lacks any of the special mythological powers attributed to it - it's like the Bermuda Triangle of female anatomy."
Changing Castro
"A woman [was] upset about a Buddhist god with a very large penis."
Genderqueer
"Seahorses are bona fide genderfuckers."
Bisexuality on the Rise
"The more they like sex, the more women like women."
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